Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Every day you close me in like a bird in a locked cage, and yet you,like the impatient birdkeper, lament on why the bird doesnt know how to fly. You tell me, how is the bird supposed to learn how to fly, when all it can do is just flap its wings in its small little limited space.
Whats the point of lamenting then and having high expectations of the bird when you aint even giving it the space to learn what it ought to to meet up with your expectations?


Everytime I come home, feeling like a bird locked in a cage. Every single attempt that I take to improve myself is always looked down upon by you or you'll just splash a pail of icy cold water over my warm and enthusiatic persona. And you claim you are protecting me, cos I am young , fresh, blur, stupid and ignorant about everything outside. because you've already set in your rigid mind the idea that Ill definitely be cheated.


ARGHHHH! Just feel like screaming and lettting the whole stifling feeling out..!


Yes, Im just a teenager-turning-adult in 2 more years, yearning for freedom!
I want to learn a lot of things, I want to meet challenges..
Thats what I want..
Yet I just feel so sad that you always make me guilty and reconsider too much stuff , 'protect' me too much that I develop a confused persona, and become a fearful person afraid of risks. I hate this part of me, the me that has developed under all that Mothering.


I just yearn to run wild on the fields, wind caressing my cheeks and hair flowing in the endless wind.. literally..


I wish to dream..
My dream home..
My dream husband.. =)
My family..
My wonderful life..


I want to dream... let it be unrealistic..
Let me have a goal..
Let me have the means to reach for it..
Unlock the shangles I beg you
Its just one of my deepest desires and dreams, Mother.

embedded in between at 12:51 PM