Tuesday, November 22, 2005
Tore this off a friend's frend's blog.i cant believe this.There were two chinese nationals giving out, get this, ANTI-CCP FLYERS! Gasp! 20
years ago Deng would have just tiannanmened their asses all the way from Beijing
but omg. The erosion of the party's political clout is evident. Despite my
extremely n00by chinese skills, I have discerned from the flyers that they are
garnering support for a movement that is to (and I quote) "support the
withdrawal of 5,000,000 from the CCP". Whoa. Plus they were giving out handbooks
of the "tuidang", apparently some anti-communism-in-china association. Gosh.
Such political defiance! How tantalisingly illegal...This is all very amazing.
I'm shocked that such practises are going on in the very heartlands of
Singapore. I wonder if they were arrested and if the CCP had gotten wind of this
shady business.
OMG! such a thing happening here in Singapore.unbelievable.right here in singapore. this law-abiding nation, where giving out of flyers to support its very own oppostion team here is even unheard of. to think it's chinese politics spreading all the way here to singapore. oh man!
history history. a new form of propaganda? all the way to 'neighbouring' singapore where there is possible anti-support for the CCP? the communists? due to historical events in singapore? u must be kidding. somemore in bishan where so many students hang out. i bet you no student would give a damn to that supposed propaganda. right here in singapore, we are even facing the crisis of youths not paying attention to local politics. what makes u so sure they will care abt china CCP and KMT?aiyo.
today the newspapers just re-iterated president bush's pledge to make freedom and democracy 1 of the pillars of its second term. ANd now the china thing here?!
sometimes i wonder. all these politics. its like stalling for time or something. some1 disagrees with something. and conflict. and history repeats itself. its gets boring . it gets monotonous. im tired of them. arent those pple involved tired?
i embrace history. i love history. and probably to some extent the politics. but..haix..
Today's the 21st November already.
about 1 and a half months more, the dramatic year of 2005 would have become history.
this year. Significant, yet traumatic.
-my first year in Temasek
-my first year where acceptance of responsibility and the decisions which comes along with it, becomes traumatic.
-this year, the roller coaster of feelings starts speeding. sometimes high, sometimes low.
Man! so many more first times.
So many many more regrets and upsets.
1. I shouldnt have played with my choices and chose tjc.
-much as I 'will never regret' coming to tj, with the people and all. Thining back it should never become a rational choice. the travelling times have proved too much. plus the stressful jc system, i seemed to have lost much of myself. the drive , the enthusiasm, the diligence, the perseverance. All lost in the mere happenings of a year. Too much.
I dun want to lose myself. Losing myself in exchange for things as dear as Temasek and OAC, is probably not worth it. I guess things cant be predicted right from the very start as well.
2. consequence of mistake number 1. staying on.
-i should have guessed that everything in jc would very much be the same. be it rj, nj or tj. bleah. i guess this shouldnt be the time for regrets now. i guess alot in tj would nvr ever be found in the face of the outside world ever again. blame it on my obstinacy then.
3. Passion should be followed. I was too blinded by hear-say. I gave up my passion for the supposed cross-combi stream.
-1 year on. dropped chemistry. And now i regret not taking up history. Though I would confess chemistry was worth the plunge , the play and the TRAUMA!
4.In connection to mistake number 3. Had I not left ex-scg30, i wouldnt meet scg 12.
-the individuals in scg12 are unique. but together, we are not really one yet. thats probably one of the only regrets.
5. OAC.
OAC drew me in for first 3 mths. perhaps i was really too blinded. perhaps i should have followed something called 'god's plan' and followed the drifts into nj, and literally forget about OAC. i did enjoy OAC. and i nvr will regret it, but the thing is- wrong time! not now! ok i shant say more.
I guess everything here, probably boils down to the initial recklessness and desire to create something new as i stepped out of IJ -fresh and new. Back to my independent self.
Now now. Next transition in life wil probably be next year. the As. and so on. Im sick of it. Im sick of how life seems to set everything out for you . it feels predestined. It is stifling. You can say that im a person who wants change. probably that explains the choice of IJ to TJ. 2 different places of different culture. I m not sure whether thats really what i want in life though. I guess, with choice comes responsiblity which only I myself can undertake.
I guess, on a cool lovely monday evening, I shouldnt think too much.
embedded in between at 8:15 AM
